Sometimes, it's just a cigar

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Fifty Shades of Life on Mars (Part One)

The film opens with a series of shots. They are done in a super realistic style, stark and sharp like a Helmut Newton portfolio.
We see Christian and Ana’s wedding.
We see Christian lavishing gifts on Ana. We see her unpacking the presents alone.
We see them flying to the UK, with cutaway shots in the first class cabin of a Dreamliner that suggest Christian is persuading Ana to give his a blowjob. The camera lingers on his Rolex as his hand forces her head down into his groin.
We see them in a London hotel, with a perfect view of Hyde Park and the Albert memorial.
The camera lingers on Christian’s hand as he shapes to slap Ana’s face, then stops the blow and caresses her, as if her fear is normal.
We see Ana in the hotel, blindfolded, being fucked by two men while Christian watches.
We see Ana, alone, looking out over Hyde Park.
We see Christian and Ana on New Bond St. We see him take her into a gentleman’s outfitters, full of country clothing. We see him weighing up a riding crop. The camera lingers on his Rolex as he raises her skirt and, in front of the shop assistant, strike her thighs with the crop.
We see Ana crying on the bed in the hotel. The camera does not linger on he thighs and legs, but it is obvious she is in pain.
We see her wipe off the remains of her makeup, and choose plain, everyday clothing. We see her leave her purse and property behind, and walk out into the rain on Park Lane.

Three men exit the hotel lift. One is obviously the porter. The others are obviously policemen. The porter fumbles with the door of the room. The policemen push past him.
CHRISTIAN: Let me guess, you’re the best cops they could send.
BURNSIDE: I’m DI Burnside, this is DI Hunt.
CHRISTIAN: Oh great. You ask for help and they send a couple of cliches.
HUNT: I told you it was a waste of time being nice Frank.
Hunt grabs Christian by the hair.
HUNT: Get you trousers on you slag, you’re nicked.
Christian wrestles free.
CHRISTIAN: My wife’s missing and you want to arrest me?
HUNT: That’s right slag. Now do you want us to drag you down to the quattro in your underpants?
BURNSIDE: Your wife’s not missing Mr Gray.She’s down the nick making a statement to our gaffer, DCI Kellogg. Now do you want to do this my way or DI Hunt’s way?
CHRISTIAN: Do you not know who I am? I’m phoning my lawyer.
Hunt punches Christian, and handcuffs him.
BURNSIDE: Yes Mr Grey we know who you are, which is why Gene is so angry. Not very good with rapists, our Gene.

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2 comments on “Fifty Shades of Life on Mars (Part One)

  1. jemima2013
    July 25, 2014

    i cant wait for part 2!!!!

    Like

  2. Pingback: A whole heap of Shade | Sometimes, it's just a cigar

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This entry was posted on July 25, 2014 by in Fifty Shades of Life on Mars, Uncategorized.

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